PYONGYANG, North Korea – Kim Jong-un was shot and killed by two American civilians today while the dictator was visiting the Tomb of King Dongmyeong in Pyongyang. North Korean officials have blamed the assassination on the C.I.A., but United States intelligence
officers deny the charges and have confirmed two U.S. men were behind the killings.
The two Americans killed Kim Jong-un, a bevy of body guards and the dictator’s two Siamese cats using a machine gun and a shotgun. After the shooting, the two unharmed Americans fled on foot and escaped via a raft down the Taedong River, portaging dams along the way, and into the Yellow Sea where hours later they were found by a Republic of Korea Naval ship. They are now being held safely in Seoul, South Korea.
The two brothers, Jimmy Elk, 32, Jason Elk, 37, originally from Garden City Idaho, work as illegal marijuana and media smugglers in South Korea. Media smugglers risk their lives transporting thumb drives containing mostly mainstream U.S. and South Korean movies, music and photos to North Korean residents. Most media smugglers are North Korean residents who have escaped to South Korea and are trying to motivate friends and family back home to also escape once they can see the outside world (through media) is not evil as the North Korean government portrays.
The two Americans smuggled marijuana for money, but smuggle media to commit “psychological warfare against the tyrannical North Korean government.”
They are self-described “proud americans” and “true patriots” who are disgusted that democratic nations have allowed people to live in terror under Kim Jong-un. They say the North Korean situation is no different than letting Iraqi citizens live under Saddam Hussein. “We need to liberate North Korea too,” Jason Elk told U.S. agents. “Bring them freedom and democracy so they can be like America.”
The brothers had long discussed executing Kim Jong-un, but could not map a way that ended with their safe escape.
But their desires became resolved after the Sony cyber attacks and the following cancellation of the comedy film, “The Interview.” The movie is a controversial satire about the assassination of Kim Jong-un that had angered the dictator. As a response to the film, the North Korean government hacked into Sony servers and released sensitive data.
North Korean hackers left a message that said movie theaters would be attacked if the film screened; this ultimately led to the decision by Sony to not release the film.
The brothers claim that no government should have the power to restrict American freedom of speech. The brothers called Sony “cowards” and said Obama should “have let the missiles fly” once the cyber terrorists were determined to be from North Korea. They both “couldn’t wait” to see “The Interview” and decided they would get revenge on North Korea for stopping the movie’s release by assassinating Kim Jong-
un. They called their act “a Christmas present to North Korea, the U.S.A. and the rest of the free world, expect for France and Russia.”
They claim they obtained the raft and information about Kim Jong-un’s whereabouts from a sympathetic North Korean official. They snuck into the country under the cover of darkness and admit “they just went for it.” They started playing Toby Keith’s “Courtesy Of The Red, White And Blue (The Angry American) ” on a portable CD player before opening fire on Kim Jon-un and his entourage. They left the CD player behind, set on repeat.
The United States is determining if a crime has been committed and, if so, will charges be brought against the brothers. The United Nations and The International Court of Justice will be consulted in the matter.